Outside of a spring lamb trotting into a slaughterhouse, there is nothing in the animal kingdom as innocent and foredoomed as the new purchaser of a country place.

S. J. Perelman · Acres and Pains (1947), ch. 2

I'd horsewhip you if I had a horse.

S. J. Perelman · Horse Feathers (screenplay, 1932), spoken by Groucho Marx

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Phineas T. Barnum · The Life of P. T. Barnum: Written by Himself (1855)

George S. Kaufman

Winston Churchill · Recorded in Martin Gilbert, 1932

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